Sunday, February 20, 2005

"Sincerely Yours"

-- February 20th, 2005 --

I can be an asshole at times. Hell, I can be an asshole a lot of times. Shit, I am just an asshole. Is that looking at myself negatively. I don't think so. It's just that I let my emotions be my judge of situations, instead of my mind. You know how Jay-Z says, "Love them with my mind, not your heart..." Guess I should listen to the God MC.

I pray for God to lift that from my heart -- especially when I am dealing with those I love. It weird, I'm not too much of a believer in the all-power of Zodiac signs... but I feel as those I have a Scorpio's wrath with a Gemini's twists. Bad sounding, ain't it...? All in all, I love the people who love me. To someone specific (G.P.) -- I love you with all my heart, soul, being, left and right thumbs, anything else that you want is yours.

My friend Danya and I had this conversation, similar to the one myself and G.P. had. I'm going to call it "Status and the Male Ego".

Danya said that when a woman becomes successful it's not really too much trouble in a relationship because a woman, if in love with a man, is in love with that man and no matter what successes she's had she is going to stick with that man. Because men are genetically predisposed to going after women. So, since it's an availability -- she has no need to really chase or go for it. Lessened by the fact that her man has been there since she was dirt broke working from the ground up -- she's more prone to stand by your side.

When it comes to men though, most women (if not all of them) worry about us and being successful. Not in a sense of a man making more money, but the appearance of the dreaded groupie.

Yes!! The groupie -- this beastly animal has been known to break up many a happy home. A skeez who likes to skeet-skeet-skeet from the window to the wall wants a successful man to add to her belt. The belief that when a man becomes successful or highly visable in positive settings it attracts eager ladies willing to become a one-night bedfellow. Something to brag about, I guess. But women feel that they become less of what they were when other women start trying to file their applications. I understand that belief. I mean it's hard when the panties are being thrown at your man 24/7. Harder if you don't know if your man is pulling them off or fending them off like they were killer bees.

It is hard when we live in a nation of excess, materialism, and sex to have strong men who can turn their backs on that. I see a young brotha, like myself, struggling to make it in this land of milk and honey -- going broke at that. Or even a person who doesn't have a pot to piss in for that matter and you got rappers and athletes either talking about having too much money or not having enough to support their family (Latrell Spreewell's bitch-ass). So, while living in a weak society, I understand a female worrying about a potentially successful brotha dippin' in the pudding bowl.

To G.P. -- you do not have to worry about me. I know what the deally-o is, Babe. I am sincerely yours. You are a key component in my success now and later on in my life. I know where home is. Or to better say, I know what side my bread is buttered on. Heh, heh, heh! In this world, you need someone who is going to be honest and keep it real with you. But, it's also a life full of progress. I am making considerable progress given my past. With this progress, I have been building from the ground floor up, and you have been right there alongside. In the future, you'll be there for my ups and my downs, my failures and my successes. I am a strong Black man standing beside an equally strong Black woman. I need you to be that for me and understand that I am yours sincerely. Yours exclusively. No one has a claim to the secrets that you and I share, the intimacy, anything -- your name alongside mines states that empathetically.

G-Money -- I can only say it, you have to understand and believe that in your own heart. I am here for you, not going anywhere, I love you. I support you in whatever you want to do.

Sincerely yours... glad to be yours sincerely...


Blogger ...of the work.... said...

Peace. Words like

February 25, 2005 at 3:23 PM

Blogger The Humanity Critic said...

Great post..

March 3, 2005 at 12:05 PM

Blogger Dayrell said...


Take it one step at a time and you'll do just fine man.

March 16, 2005 at 4:10 PM

Blogger courtneyelizabeth said...

very well said.....nice read.

March 23, 2005 at 3:00 PM


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