Tuesday, October 26, 2004

"There's No Us in Trust"

-- October 26th, 2004 --

"How could you do this to me?!!" "What made you think of such a thing?!!?" "With who?!!?" "...why...?"

Questions from the heart of a person who has been done wrong too many times... by too many people. Yes, I know that you have been hurt, led astray, misused, abused, and left for dead by some miscellaneous man or woman who has decided that you no longer fit the equivalent of who they want in a relationship. It understandable to ascertain that you have been with the person for a long period of time. Your hearts have joined together in unison. You both have met each other's respectable families. Spent loving nights together joined at the hip and awoke to have eyes greet the arising of a new day dawning.

But all that is over now. It is a startling epidemic that both those in relationships and ones who are single face daily. We do NOT trust each other. I believe that you never put 100% of your trust into another person because people have a tendency to fail you. But the "I-first" mentality seems to be the trend in relationships as much as it is in rap music. Why is this? Could it be because men and women no longer have patience to try and understand one another for who they may be? Or is it because the stereotypes that we place on each other are beliefs that we hold true to?

All in all, it is quicker to lose trust rather than to gain it. But how do you feel if it was never established? That no matter what you did whether good or otherwise -- it was perceived that you had an ulterior motive. A friend of mines is going through this relationship -- although he doesn't understand or maybe acknowledges this fact. The woman that he chose to be on-and-off with will never trust him. Even though he has done his share of wrong in his day -- he still stick it out with her through her spaz out moments.

A particular event that happened was we were at a club, all dancing -- and she happens to stroll in unannounced. Cool -- no problem... But she came in when she saw him dancing with a miscellaneous chick who was friends with us. Miscellaneous in her eyes because she didn't know her -- keyword: instant threat... So she yanks my friend and begins berating him about his "transgressions" -- so he becomes one of those house Negroes that BruthaCode was talking about in one of his blog posts. He was attached to her hip, no even really to come around the girls who we're friends with... who were also the ones who rode up there with us. My friend is a dance major in College -- so his life revolves around fast-paced syncopating rhythms... but was limited to two-stepping with his "girl" because she didn't want to dance in front of all these people?!!?

Crazy, huh?!!?

Now, my thoughts about battlin' in clubs while being in College is that it's lame. Who wants to see two or three or four guys poppin' and lockin' when there is a multitude of girls waiting to be gyrated upon. But on this night there was indeed a battle. My boy does have skills. He was battling a couple of cats who I knew from the Cleveland chapter of Alpha Phi Alpha Fraternity, Inc. They were nice too. My boy was soooooo rattled from having gotten into argument after argument with his "girl" over so many stupid stuff that he was couldn't concentrate on what he was doing in the battle and got ate up.

Stupid crazy, huh?!!?

Now, I'm not just taking my boy's side because that's my dawg. He has his mistakes as well. He doesn't trust her either. But through all this distrust, they managed to keep a tab on one another for three years. Why put yourself through all the stress, heartache, and anger if you cannot deal with the person you've decided to spend your time with? It seems ludricous to do such a thing, right?!!!?

Insane crazy, huh?!!?

Which leads me to believe that you have to most definitely leave trust to the Lord above. Because if left in the hands, hearts, and minds of us humans -- we are bound to try and find all the flaws possible in that belief. Trust can be a powerful drug or a dangerous weapon...

Crazy, huh?!!?


Blogger kiesha said...

without trust there's no relationship...just two people trying to hold on to each other because they fear being alone...

October 30, 2004 at 11:45 PM

Blogger K-Star said...

But my friend doesn't realize that. That was how it was when I was in a relationship with my Ex. It was sickening and sad in the long run.

November 1, 2004 at 5:25 PM

Blogger kiesha said...

he'll realize it in his own time...people have to reach that "fed up" point before they get out of a bad relationship. sometimes it takes some people sooooo long to reach that point.

November 1, 2004 at 9:24 PM


Post a Comment

<< Home